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Dirty text messages



Dirty text messages

More short jokes for mobile phones
silly sms messages Funny Text Messages Silly quotes sms messages rude text messages Funny Text Messages Rude text messages
dirty text messages Funny Text Messages Chat up sms messages friendship text messages Funny Text Messages Friendship text messages
wisdom sms text messages Funny Text Messages Wisdom sms messages fun sms jokes Funny Text Messages Fun sms jokes
text message jokes Funny Text Messages Text message jokes

Jelly Baby goes 2 the Dr & says “Dr i’ve got aids” Dr replys “U cant have aids ur a jelly Baby” Jelly Baby says “yes but Dr i’ve been sleepin wiv ALLSORTS!

chicken and egg in bed,chicken has head on pillow smoking.Egg rolls over annoyed saying”i guess we answered that question”

A teacher ask”wot part of the body goes to heaven first?”A child replies”feet- coz every nite i c my mum with her feet in the air screamin GOD I’M COMIN!

Little Girl:”Mommy I just found out that the little boy next door has a penis like a peanut” Mommy:”u mean its small?”Little Girl:”No its salty”

an essex girl has a car crash and an ambulance arrives.the paramedic asks ‘how many fingers have i got up?’the girl replies- oh no i think im paralised too

Flirty sms

I think i should tell you what people are saying behind your back…. Nice Ass!!!!!!!

I wish I was a teddy bear, that lay upon your bed, so everytime you cuddled it, you cuddled me instead

Luv is a sensation dat is caused by temptation.a boy puts his location in a girls destination.do u get my explanation or do u wanna demonstration?

I like your style- I like your class- but most of all i like your arse!

Do you like maths?if so add a bed subtract ur clothes divide your legs and we can multiply!

I want triplets You want twins.Lets get in bed and see who wins!

Of all the babes ur my selection.please dont giv me a rejection.my teeth are clean for ur

Inspection so giv my mouth a tongue injection!

If your right leg was thanksgiving and Your left leg was Christmas could I meet U between the holidays?

humour naughty sms

friendship is like peeing in your pants. every1 can c it but only u can feel its true warmth.thank u 4 being the pee in my pants xxxx

(_!_)An arse (__!__)Fat arse (!)Tight arse (_?_)Dumb arse (_*_)Sore arse (_zzz_)Tired arse (_E=mc2_)Smart arse (_x_)Kiss my arse!!

He met a lady while browsing. She unzipped his dotcom when downloading. Since he was virus free he slotted his floppydisk into her hotmail she screamed yahoo!

Today its cool to have small cars and small computers.Soon it will be cool to have a small penis too.then you my friend will be THE MAN!!

Viagra now available in eye drops, you don’t get an erection but you look hard!

T-MOBILE regrets 2 inform u that the network has gone down on everyone except u.We regret 2 inform u that no one would go down on u.not even a network

I only have SEX on days that begin with T: Thanksgiving. Tuesday. Thursday. Today. Tomorrow. Thaturday. thunday.. Tevery day!

What do you do when the only person who can stop you crying, is the person who makes you cry in the first place?

You might regret what you do- but you’ll you regret what you don’t do SO much more

2 let go doesnt mean 2 stop carin.2 let go is to learn theres sumthin beyond.2 let go means acceptin reality.2 let go is lovin more coz u only want the best.

If you are the flame you can’t be burned

Yesterday is history tomorrow is a mystery.today is a gift that is why we call it the present!

Intelligence is like a river. The deeper it is the less noise it makes

From the moment I saw u, I wanted to be inside u, I love ur smell, the way ur tongue feels, the way u tighten and loosen mmmmmmmmmmmmm……NEW SHOES!!!!!!!!!!

He came 2 me 1 nite… explored my body… licked- sucked- swallowed & had his fill… wen satisfied he left… I was hurt… DAMN MOSQUITO

In the morning I do not eat because I think of you, at noon I do not eat because I think of you, in the evening I do not eat because I think of you, at night I do not sleep because I am hungry.

Someday u may lose ur hair.u may lose ur teeth- ur money & even lose ur mind.But 1 thing u will never loose is ur good looks.coz u cant lose wot u don’t have!

I had a wet dream about you last night …. I pissed myself laughing when you fell of a cliff!

It goes in dry it comes out wet.the longer its in the stronger it gets.we can have it in bed just you and me…its not what you think its a cup of tea!

Last nite i wantd u.needed u so badly dat it hurt.wantd 2 taste u.i wantd u in me so u could work ur magic on me…but i couldnt find u.u stupid.. PARACETAMOL!

At 1st a little nibble- a slow & temptin lick.i suck & munch my liquid lunch & den i swallow quick! CADBURYS CREAM EGG HOW DO U EAT URS?

Tell me.is it going in?..yeah ..is it hurting?..ooh yeah ..ouch its hurtin ..ok i wil put it in slowly ..stil hurtin..ahh yeh ..den lets try d other shoe madam

Last nite i coodnt sleep.i wantd u warm against my skin.i wantd u on me.i wantd 2 feel u all over my body.. but i coodnt find u!Where did i put my PYJAMAS?

I luv the way it rubs against the soft pink flesh creatin a creamy foamy liquid, as it thrust in & out up& down, can’t wait til nxt time I LUV MY TOOTHBRUSH

come here.take off ur pants and get on top of me….enjoy me until ur totally satisfied lovingly urs TOILET!!!!

I luv u- I luv u- I luv u almighty,I wish ur pyjamas were close to me nighty.Dont be mistaken.now dont be mislead I mean on the clothesline and not in my bed

Wen i look at the sun i c u!wen i look at the moon i c u!wen i look at the sea I c u… well get out of my way!

Jelly Baby goes 2 the Dr & says “Dr i’ve got aids” Dr replys “U cant have aids ur a jelly Baby” Jelly Baby says “yes but Dr i’ve been sleepin wiv ALLSORTS!

chicken and egg in bed,chicken has head on pillow smoking.Egg rolls over annoyed saying”i guess we answered that question”

A teacher ask”wot part of the body goes to heaven first?”A child replies”feet- coz every nite i c my mum with her feet in the air screamin GOD I’M COMIN!

Little Girl:”Mommy I just found out that the little boy next door has a penis like a peanut” Mommy:”u mean its small?”Little Girl:”No its salty”

an essex girl has a car crash and an ambulance arrives.the paramedic asks ‘how many fingers have i got up?’the girl replies- oh no i think im paralised too

Misleading Naughty sms

From the moment I saw u, I wanted to be inside u, I love ur smell, the way ur tongue feels, the way u tighten and loosen mmmmmmmmmmmmm…………..NEW SHOES!!!!!!!!!!

He came 2 me 1 nite… explored my body… licked- sucked- swallowed & had his fill… wen satisfied he left… I was hurt… DAMN MOSQUITO

In the morning I do not eat because I think of you, at noon I do not eat because I think of you, in the evening I do not eat because I think of you, at night I do not sleep because I am hungry.

Someday u may lose ur hair.u may lose ur teeth- ur money & even lose ur mind.But 1 thing u will never loose is ur good looks.coz u cant lose wot u don’t have!

I had a wet dream about you last night …. I pissed myself laughing when you fell of a cliff!

It goes in dry it comes out wet.the longer its in the stronger it gets.we can have it in bed just you and me…its not what you think its a cup of tea!

Last nite i wantd u.needed u so badly dat it hurt.wantd 2 taste u.i wantd u in me so u could work ur magic on me…but i couldnt find u.u stupid.. PARACETAMOL!

At 1st a little nibble- a slow & temptin lick.i suck & munch my liquid lunch & den i swallow quick! CADBURYS CREAM EGG HOW DO U EAT URS?

Tell me.is it going in?..yeah ..is it hurting?..ooh yeah ..ouch its hurtin ..ok i wil put it in slowly ..stil hurtin..ahh yeh ..den lets try d other shoe madam

Last nite i coodnt sleep.i wantd u warm against my skin.i wantd u on me.i wantd 2 feel u all over my body.. but i coodnt find u!Where did i put my PYJAMAS?

I luv the way it rubs against the soft pink flesh creatin a creamy foamy liquid, as it thrust in & out up& down, can’t wait til nxt time I LUV MY TOOTHBRUSH

come here.take off ur pants and get on top of me….enjoy me until ur totally satisfied lovingly urs TOILET!!!!

I luv u- I luv u- I luv u almighty,I wish ur pyjamas were close to me nighty.Dont be mistaken.now dont be mislead I mean on the clothesline and not in my bed

Wen i look at the sun i c u!wen i look at the moon i c u!wen i look at the sea I c u… well get out of my way!

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